So far I have mostly written about the self destructive things in my life and although those things are part of who I am today but 3/4 of everything I've done I'm far from being proud of those things, if anything I hate who I used to be. But I would now like to talk about the positive things that's impacted my life and I think made me realize Starting with my mother I couldn't have had a better mother she was probably the purest at heart person you would ever meet she had a loving nature and an almost child like trust and caring nature of the world. I remember as a child she would read bible stories to me and my brother and would always cuddle me when I would get sick an would always made everyone in house loved and welcome. My dad although he worked out of town most of time always worked hard for his family and anytime I would do something stupid he would get stern and after he would blow his stack he would come in and hug me and give me lecture me on him just wanting the best for me and was doing it because he loved me. And my brother although we tormented each other I would give my life to save his and I think God everyday for my brother, when the chips are down and life's gone to shit the one person who is always there to pick up the pieces is my brother.  And although my wife Haylee didn't come into my life until 4 years ago she saved my life and gave me a new life and new hope for the future.  She backs me up no matter what happens and is always there when I doubt myself.